F:AK – The Kindness Rock Project

Blog awards 2

As I said previously, I don’t usually do awards, but I’d like to highlight the bloggers who nominated me :).

Thank you Aathmana. Aathmana titles her blog Read. Love. Live. As her title says she loves reading, and writing. She started her blog during lockdown and definitely uses the time well.

Thank you Eilidh Horder. This is from a REALLY long time ago, but I want to highlight her blog :). She spreads calm and sunshine and has some interesting thoughts. I’m looking forward to her future posts.

Thank you Fit recovery. Jim writes about biking. He cycles a lot, like a really lot, and any question you have about bikes, saddles and trails just ask him :). He writes about his recovery journey and shares insight, understanding, and hope that it is possible. That you, too, can do it and be happy.

Thank you Mentally ill in America. He blogs about his mental health journey and offers comprehensive advice/explanation to people struggling. He started blogging 3 months ago and has come along amazingly in those 3 months. Go support him!

Thank you Mental Health 360⁰. Caz blogs about mental health. The 360 degrees reflects that it is from all angles and aspects. She covers anything and everything in her blog….

Blog awards in my view serve 2 purposes. One is to help bloggers who need support along. The other, the one I like better, is to show someone they’re appreciated. That you like their blog. For that I’d like to create the I love your blog award in response to these awards and I’d love your thoughts.

The I love your blog award (I was thinking about this one night when I couldn’t sleep) means you comment on any blogs you love (aim for 15 – 20 but 1 is perfect too). That you love their blog and give 3 sentences why – or more, you can write an epistle if you want. You would not need to say it’s an award and they won’t need to do anything with it. If you want you could write a new comment telling them to pass it on. To comment on preferably newer bloggers, or bloggers with little engagement posts and let them you love their blog and why. Anyone, everyone, no matter how long they’ve been blogging, or if they’ve been blogging for 20 years, loves appreciation. Before I write a post on this I’d love your thoughts….

Love, light and glitter

Remember, you are beautiful. You are worth it. You are enough.

A new day. Yom Kippur. ED

Today is a new day. But, is it really? It is. I guess it is. I’ve not been freaking at all and I’m grateful for that. It’s been a busy morning.

I was up last night, had in my head the lyrics ‘up at night’. Woke up from a dream and was up for 2 hours. I couldn’t sleep in as this morning I had a blood test. In preparation for Yom Kippur I had a shower and washed my hair. Was pretty dizzy and I’m grateful the dizziness has passed for now.

I had a blood test. When I did I asked the nurse if I could weigh myself. I actually now fit into the normal BMI category. It makes me realise how crap BMI is. I don’t usually do swearing. I hate that people think BMI’s are accurate… they really aren’t, and I it hurts me that people care where they are on their BMI’s. When I lost weight 2 years ago (I went from a size 18/20 skirt to a size 8/10 skirt) then according to my BMI I was still overweight. I mean, seriously???) …so I’ve lost about 5 kilo in the last couple of weeks. Maybe less because usually when I weigh myself I make sure I’ve drunk lots and now I didn’t. Maybe it also makes a difference the time of day. Actually, not less. Because the 5 kilo was with a leeway of 1.5. It’s more like 6.5.

RR – my rabbi – called to check how I was and really to wish me a good year. I am really touched he did so. I told him that I’m not sure if fasting will be a good idea for me at the moment. You know, whenever I’ve discussed fast days with him I’ve never told him anything. I told him I’m not eating enough and that after sukkot I’ll have to figure out what to do about it, make a plan and decide how to go forwards. (I’ve actually sent a message to my GP asking for a referral to a specific psychotherapy service that doesn’t offer just talk therapy, and will see if he does it, and look privately, yet again).

I opened my laptop to see this sitting here. Basically he told me that I shouldn’t be fasting tonight/tomorrow. Which is kinda weird for me. And that I should eat normally (whatever ‘normally’ means at the moment when I’m really not eating much).

It’s soon Yom Kippur. The day is a jewish holiday of ‘atonement’. What it really means is that the jews believe that on this day god, the source of the universe, forgave them, and that every year on this day god will forgive you. It’s a day of connection. Of connection to a source – a source I haven’t really worked through enough what I think about. Connection to a source that I don’t know what I believe about it.

I planned on fasting. It’s definitely better for my mindset if I don’t fast, it’s still strange for me not to. Strange because I was going to do my best to fast even though I don’t know what I believe. Because I’m jewish. Because even if I don’t know what I believe maybe one day I will know. Because I’ve been brought up religious. Because for now I’m keeping to the religion even though, as I said, I haven’t worked it through. So I planned on fasting. And I’m not going to be. It’s actually going to be harder, than it has been the past couple of weeks, to eat anything. Though I will do my best to eat something, because, because I know that’s what I have to do.

It’s a day. Another day of life.

And I haven’t read through this so it probably makes very little sense.

Happy new year!

I wonder when I’ll next be on. I’m not going to have my laptop on me for a few weeks and I’m not sure if I’ll be on WordPress at the time or not.

Always remember that you’re worth it…

Love, light and glitter