I was dialogue journalling before. And, it made me feel crazy. Coz of the way I was splitting myself. Normally I’m dialogue journalling then it’s, I don’t have the words to describe it. I dialogue with myself to understand what’s going on (I can actually probably do it without writing but never do).

I decided to do this yesterday cuz I wanted to order something online. I was researching it and deciding whether to buy it (turns out it’s not so simple to buy but that’s besides the point). And buying it makes it so certain. Coz this is public I’m not comfortable going into more detail. Read whatever you want into it, however dark you get is okay. I actually texted SHOUT which was a waste of time. Anyways, I realised I was hesitant to order it, to be so definite, to make it so certain. So last night began journaling it through. Coz realised there must be a part of me that wants life if I’m hesitating to buy it. So this morning I began journaling with that part, then decided to let them dialogue with each other (both just scared to say hello coz can wanting only death and wanting only life coexist). Anyways, so yeah I’m feeling crazy. And there’s zero connection between me and my words anyways. So I dunno anyways if I’m creating something that doesn’t exist. And. Yeah.

Editing this to add what I wrote on Instagram.

10 thoughts on “I was dialogue journalling

    1. That means that I’m not connected. Kinda like when you know something to be true but it isn’t really? I don’t ever say this coz I don’t like to but it comes under the category of disassociation to an extent.

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  1. First the mundane, Eliza – no, I never have written a dialogue journal.

    That said, your idea does intrigue. For one thing, like all writing, it helps to organize your thoughts. Rather than a babel of internal voices vying for attention, the page (or the screen) offers one version.

    Moreover, even if it’s difficult to engage with the “you” who wrote the words, it’s far superior to the alternative, which is to keep everything penned up inside. There, in your mind, that self you committed to words may been shouted down, silenced and forgotten. Instead, you’ve given her a voice, and those insights she offers add to your progress.

    Nicely done, Eliza!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I’d say writing a book is like dialogue journaling too, only I’m doing it in a whole different world, with different scenarios and characters. When I write, I can be any character I want, create any scene/obstacle I want, and get my self/character into and out of trouble. I can “say” things I always say, things I’d never dare say, things I wish I could say.
    So, if dialogue journaling is crazy, so are most writers out there.

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  3. I didn’t think there was a name for that, but I guess it’s what you’ve been doing on here at times when you write the things you (a) think and what the other side (b) of you thinks. I never tried it myself. I usually keep it in the confines of my own head, but it’s definitely an interesting concept that might reveal some cool things.

    Stay golden!

    Liked by 1 person

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