I have no words. They're stuck. Somewhere between. My heart and brain. Where all the lost words. Lie.

12 thoughts on “Thinking… (do I ever not?)

  1. You can and should write everything. I am sorry that I wrote that some things could trigger me.
    In my case, as long as I know that someone doesn’t want me to freak out, I can handle it.
    And it is also often the case that it might even help someone, should you share “your world”, what is going on inside or around you, when everything isn’t all bright or good.
    I was very unsure about what I can write or should write with others as well this year and made mistakes, it happens because without some mistakes we wouldn’t be alive.
    If you don’t want to share everything publicly, that is understandable because I also felt very, very, very uncomfortable by doing so, but I had to at some point because otherwise it would have destroyed me. I guess most people are only sharing good things, either because they also think it is not okay or because others also expect that from them or each other. But we have bad experiences, we have problems, we have had a lot of shit in our lives for various reasons. So we need to somehow be able to share it at least with someone. Otherwise we would all think, everyone else is fine or doesn’t need to hear our stuff, while someone might have waited for such words or things their whole life. Opening up about the dark, broken and painful things can also help others and especially yourself at some point. Because when at some point there might not be anything dark or broken left to process or handle, you would feel a lot better. But of course you as I myself, would need a friend or friends for that. Humans aren’t made to be alone. At least not to feel always alone or hold everything back. ❤

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  2. You have all these thoughts because they need out and want to be processed.
    The less things you have to handle on your own and hold back, the less thoughts (at least harming and pressuring ones) you will have. Giving a lot of free space for you to have other thoughts or just enjoy things. Although this might seem impossible right now.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Dear Eliza, keep thinking and keep writing. Your words may the be just what someone needs to hear/read.
    To me, writing is an outlet for everything, pain and joy.
    Wishing you much peace and joy this holiday season! 2020 was a very hard year, but I have faith that 2021 will bring about many miracles for all of us.
    Many blessings to you today and always! 🙏❤🤗😘

    Liked by 1 person

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