I just want to put this down. I really wanted to purge today. And I didnt. I tried but didnt force it. Just let it be. However nauseous I was. However much I felt like I couldn’t breathe. However much I knew it would be that way for I had way too much junk. It feels so major, though in some ways is so minor. And, I guess it is major because to me it is a big deal so it’s as big a deal as it is to me. I really really wanted to. And didn’t. It’s not something I make such an issue of staying away from for I don’t usually want to enough. I’m actually feeling pretty proud of myself for it though. Strangely enough.

Also, it’s a big deal for I’ve been doing it way more often re

I’m grateful. Was busy today. Journaled. Read. Spent time with family. Started a pilates class. Had a shower (what???? When it’s only Monday??) Which is another thing not trying to push too much. Loving my tidy room with all the cuteness. Texted someone who does energy work to make a phone appointment. That was really brave of me, for found it scary to ask for however much of a non issue I think it should be. I’m grateful I did for next week being rosh hashanah – jewish near year – is really freaking me out. I’m hoping the reasons are just anger and not more, for I’m not sure what any of my thoughts mean or are referencing. I’m hoping this phone appointment will calm some of it and make living through those days doable. I don’t care if I completely freak out then, so long as I get through them okay. I’ll speak to her (or not speak whilst she does dowsing or energy work or whatever) on Tuesday. I’m hoping I can do it during morning work hours so that I’ll have a break after before teaching.

This post was meant to just be the first paragraph. Ended up rambling way too much.

Thank you all for being here with me.

Love, light and glitter

22 thoughts on “Yay me. And rambling 58217

  1. Not purging IS huge!!! ♥ Congratulations. 🙂 Breathe Eliza… one moment at a time. Try and stay in the moment as much as you can. Future tripping can be deadly… far worse than what it actually is, I’ve found. Good work taking care of yourself!!!!! I remember those days oh so well.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I know it is. At least yesterday I didn’t.

      I’m staying with what is. I’m nervous for the days so trying to make a plan to handle it, and deal with some of what is bothering me about it, rather than not handle it when it comes. It’s more that the days are bringing stuff up, rather than anything else.

      Thanks for being here…

      Ps. I’m enjoying your blog (the posts that I’ve read). Feel good….

      Love, light and glitter

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Being brave is not always easy; try is all we can do. Happy New Year to you and all the best with your phone appointment and pilates: that’s a step in the right direction. You might want to try Zumba some time: great fun! 👍

    Liked by 1 person

      1. There are classes all over the place where I live. I’m sure you’ll find them too. Quite often they take place in school or community halls. Look online for classes in your area. 👍

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Maybe one day 🙂
          How often do you post by the way? Coz’ I’ve been checking your blog to make sure I haven’t missed your posts (I know I’m following it but I’ve had it before with people that I just somehow miss posts, either because it doesn’t show in reader, or I’m just me).

          Love, light and glitter

          Liked by 1 person

          1. Thanks for asking; that’s very sweet of you. I try to post every Wednesday afternoon, as when we took a year off travelling through Europe I got used to that routine. My next post should be tomorrow. 😉
            Good luck with fitness class! 👍

            Liked by 1 person

  3. Hell yeah, you should be hugely proud! I remember the days of being full to pop and finding it insanely difficult to not purge, because it had become a reflex, a done deal. But it’s possible to come away from that and be kinder to yourself, even though it’s not easy.. and you’re doing it! Huge congrats. What’s the energy work, like a first telephone consultation to see whether it’s something you’d want to do face to face..? Sending hugs,
    Caz xxxx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Energy work means that someone uses dowsing or energy stuff, like kinesiology (this person doesn’t), emotion code, EFT (tapping) or along any of those lines. On the phone just because I rather the phone. People use such things for all sorts of things. I find it helpful. The only way it’s helpful is if the person is really good at what they’re doing – as with anything at although.

      Thanks C,

      Been thinking of you.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. That’s really cool – I don’t know much about energy work but for some reason I thought you’d have to do it in person. Doing it over the phone is brilliant, far more comfortable when you’re not up for the whole one on one thing (or even leaving the house). Really hope you’re doing okay today lovely, take good care of yourself xxxx

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Yeah, definitely! I don’t think I’d manage to do it face to face (although if it were therapy I’d do that face to face, even though it’d mean no speaking).
          Today is a new day. How are you doing today?
          ((hugs))
          Love, light and glitter

          Liked by 1 person

          1. I guess every day is a bit different with how we feel and what we’re up to doing. Some days I don’t want to talk to anyone on the phone, some days I don’t want to/can’t leave the house, so like you I appreciate the ability to have different options with how to do things. Today is definitely a new day (thankfully!) I hope it’s a better one for you, please go easy on yourself xxxx

            Liked by 1 person

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